Surfing Gilli Trawangan

Good morning Gilli T, time to utilise the outdoor gym, no changing the weights here, one size fits all...

Home for a few days...

The outdoor gym round the back of the bungalows, no monthly membership fee here, nice sign included...

With testosterone levels on the up it was time to get even more manly and invest in some high quality military hardware...

Got myself a bow and speer gun, customs are going to have a field day! At least it may distract them from the 50 packets of £1 cigaretts also in the bag...

Gilli T is the biggest party island of the three, expect a beach rave every night and these to keep you through the day, dragon fruit smoothies...

Rainbow...

Time to get in the water and get the surf on. With a shallow coral reef below this was always going to be fun....

The locals are absolutely nuts, apparently there are "surf gangs" who steal the waves...

Dinner time and the worlds biggest popadoms, why did we order three?!?!

Another mean Indian...

Had an absolute shocker on booking.com and ended up paying £357 for a hotel room (long story) to tonight it's...reggae jiggy jiggy bar and then onto the blue marlin pool party...

Kuta Clubs & Binge Eating...

Checked into a boutique hotel for a tenner, one of the best we've visited around the world...

Have a bath with a view...

Time to sample Kuta's night life. Walk down the street and you will be hassled every ten metres by locals attempting to sell any drug under the sun. Death penalty, whatever. They're not even subtle...

Lee brothers Making allies with some more Germans...

The clubs have it all here, amazing deep house, super cold air con and a free dance show when queeing at the bar...

Feeling a bit peckish from the night before it was time to hit the streets. Kuta is seriously built up and is a far way from the islands. Make yourself at home and go to pizza express...

Or a smashing pizza buffet...

Grab some tax free coffee...

And finish off in the ice cream parlour...

These little puppies feed 2-3 people. 7 scoops of Italian ice cream, cream, buttons and syrup. If you don't have friends then just eat it all. 

Can't go anywhere without one of these...

Thought it looked cool...

Later that day sky garden was on the cards, with unlimited free beer ...

And all you can eat BBQ for £2.50. They really don't hold back. Steaks. Burgers. Tuna steak. King prawns. Ribs. Sausages. It goes on....plate number three...

Time to crash. 

The three kings of Kuta...

It was time for some indulgence in Kuta, mainland Bali, checking into a swanky hotel for £7/night...

With some great room service, rib eye steak for £2.50, don't mind if I do...

Sky Garden was on the cards, probably the biggest and best club I have ever visited...with six rooms, unlimited beer & BBQ and a cracking sky room bar...

Feeling a little jaded from the night before we decided to be cultural and checkout the mcdonalds, rice instead of fries, tea instead of coke...

Talking of culture, here is some real Indonesian Hindu culture...every and I mean every street, beach, bike, restaurant, car, toilet, dog, or cat will have one of these attached to it to scare of the demons...

Each morning the streets are scrubbed and washed before these offerings are scattered everywhere. Having been made daily in the masses. 

Every quick-e-mart here has a mini kitchen, serving up much needed slushies, noodles, toasties, pasta...

Surf time, with panda...

Next up, the island hostel. Not really a hostel...

Why not rent one of these beasts for £2 a day and explore mainland Bali...

Mainland Bali is completely different to the rest of the place. Far more built up, swanky restaurants, big hotels...

And some great spots to hangout for the sunsets...

The only thing that isn't cheap is alcohol, being overinflated to rinse the Aussie masses. A cheaper and more interesting option, make your own pop up bar in front of a local corner shop, with 1 in 3 bottles of vodka being fake you can have an interesting evening...

You may even find yourself at a villa surrounded by hundreds of Germans, bit like gatwick airport car park here...

They love their beer...

Rustic tea pots aren't the thing anymore, kettles are the way forward...

Mainland Kuta Bali, drinking, beach, sleeping, surfing and lots of Aussies. That's it. Time for some culture...

Lombok life & boating to Bali

After the Mt. Rinjani "experience" we arrived in Lombok and checked into a great hotel for some relaxation time and some binge eating...

It was western time, first time in a while, the pizzas here are so much better than in Italy, no exaggeration...

Everyone has a stone Piza oven. Se interesting beers get served up here...

The kids start young here, hitting the streets selling bracelets, expect to be pestered at least 5-10 times at dinner...

Some much needed beach time was needed to relax those feet. One helluva beach with not one person on...

Sit down and the t-shirt brigade will be on you...turn a shoulder and someone will be bombing it along the beach on a mo-ped to sell you some of Lomboks finest threads...

We discovered that the only thing to do in Lombok is surfing. Shme. Relaxation time over, better sort out some transport to Bali. Check into this ace and you'll be served by a man with an MBA...(check out the paper sign)

You can catch a flight with "Captain Rogers, the tall bold man from England who flies with a beer" back to Bali in 25 minutes for only £20. We were advised to book the safer option, driving to Serangiggi port and then hopping on a boat to the Gillis and back to Bali. 

This guy turned out to be an absolute hero, having studied english to become a teacher he gave us lots of info and advice...

• University is $120 a year for westerners 

• having 3 girlfriends on campus is normal 

•the average Indonesian mans penis is around 2 inches. 5 is largeee

•to become a policeman on Lombok you have to be at least 160cm, no brain cells required

•Lombok is "the island of 1,000 mosques" with one in every village every 100metres...

Another reason to get back to Hindu Bali, one of these will go off in your ears every morning at 4am. The majority of the mosques run out of money and are only halve built. If you get a finished one then it can be quite a sight...

Hopped on the boat, Bali BACON Bound...

People just keep photo bombing our pictures, how rude...

There was some guy on the boat who did not stop grinning singing to himself for the whole two hour journey. Probably listening to s club. I remember my first MP3 player...

Passing Gillis on the way, cheeky pano shot with all three islands...

Arriving in Bali to sort out passports before Imigration closes. When your pressed for time  a good 50p "incentive" will take you through every red light to arrive in time! They love a good undertake here, honk your horn & flash your lights, far makes it far more acceptable...

Sky garden here we come...all you can eat BBQ and unlimited beer for £2.50, later to turn into a six floor super club with free flowing cocktails...